Have you ever heard your wife say, “You have no Butt” kind of stops you in your tracks? Well the good news is, my wife is still checking out my butt or checking to see if I sat in something. I have noticed a few facts that may prove she is right. Lately I have been scooching myself up on my chair more than before and even belts aren’t holding up the britches.

My wife says it is just not fair, can I give you some of my butt, I always want to answer that in a perverted way. They complain about their butts and now she is complaining about mine too. Now when we watch TV, she points out all the guys with nice butts, when did she get into butts. I never thought I had a nice butt, but I guess my derriere was quite the showstopper when we met.

By chance I came across a pair of American Eagle jeans called AE NE(X)T LEVEL AIRFLEX ORIGINAL STRAIGHT JEAN, yep this hip 55-year-old Fat Dad is shopping at American Eagle. I am not saying this will give you a butt, but it will make your wife’s head turn. This is made with magic fabric, it feels like jeans, looks like jeans but it stretches like soft pants. All the guys know what soft pants are, this is crazy magical material that will fit even your odd size Fat Dads physic.

My wife was happy to get me out of “Dad Jeans” and I was happy things stopped shifting around in hyperspace when I moved around. The best part is, I feel pretty…. Just kidding, I feel amazed my wife still appreciates when I try to look better for her, and I can dream one day American Eagle will make a magical shirt that hides my Fat Dad belly.