Dear Diary, I have been married 27 years. The 2 oldest kids are out of the house; my youngest is a senior in High School this year. So the dynamics of the home waters are starting to settle, but my Honey Do list seems to keep growing turbulent. Is this because my wife is losing laborers to do these highly important “to her” tasks? I break these tasks down in order of her importance.

Honey Do DEFCON 1; Everyday Do’s like; garbage, dishes, clear counters and put stuff away, these are very doable and are her everyday stresses. These get done by well-rehearsed questions we all know the answers too and I think she does too, like; Is the garbage full? Do we have any dishes in the sink? Are there cloths in the washer?  Did the mailman come yet?   Are those your shoes on the floor? Like a great sales closer, there’s no escape.

Honey Do DEFCON 2; anything after DEFCON 1 that doesn’t get done moves straight to DEFCON 3

Honey Do DEFCON 3; Weekend chores; general yard maintenance, laundry, straighten basement, make the bed, kids clean your room, clean the garage and pick up doggie doo-doo. If these don’t get done, you could surf her waves of emotions all week until they are complete. This is more of challenge and the task master needs to be strategic to layout the high priority options. She will have complete mutiny if she ties up the scalawags’ weekend completely.

Honey Do DEFCON 4; Stretch goals, every wife needs to have them and they will wait years with a long-term sales plan on how they are going to get you to do these tasks before your death. These include anything to do with paint, caulk, tile, flooring or landscaping.

I love you Honey & always will. God has blessed me with you and even though you make me do my chores every day, I appreciate your ability to keep the cogs of our home turning, even if I didn’t get them dusted this week.

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